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Archive for March 2nd, 2007

Bus Journey

I took the Megabus the other day to Edinburgh.     It was really windy, so no double deckers were allowed on the Forth Bridge.    Happily, we were a single decker.   

But what was this?    A crabbit battle-axe woman in a dirty yellow fluorescent jacket with megabus.com on the back (like that exactly) marched down the bus and told us it would be windy and that we had to fasten our seat belts.    She marched back up the bus checking we had done them up too.   Airline style.    What did she expect?   Turbulence?    Take-off?

The seats were not too wide and I had a window seat.     A  large woman in a great big puffy anorak had wedged herself in beside me, so I just didn’t bother with a belt.    I was really wedged, and certainly was not going anywhere until she moved first, and she was belted in.   

We got going.    The driver turned the heating up to max.    The anorak next to me stayed firmly on.    I was beginning to find it rather hot and stuffy.    The driver clearly was beginning to find it hot and stuffy, and opened a lot of window – remember, it was too windy for doubledeckers – and it got pretty blowy inside the bus.     Perhaps the bus only had an ON and an OFF for the heating.   We got there on time, and luckily, the anorak got off at the same stop as me.

The bus back should have been a double decker, but was in fact an old tatty single decker service bus clearly drafted in from Carlisle going by the notices stuck on the windows.   The driver tried to dial up M90 INVERNESS on the electronic sign at the front of the bus, but clearly this was not in an English bus’s vocabulary.   He went off and got a mate, and between them they eventually managed to find  “Stagecoach”.    The driver sighed and then went off and came back with a blue sign M90 INVERNESS and carefully blu-tacked it to the windscreen.

Above my head in the bus there, there was a vent thing to give you air, a reading light and a button with a woman on it.      Press for a woman?  The last time I went on a megabus, the buttons had men on them.    Just an observation.    

It is only £1 each way, express service (plus 50p booking fee) – so mustn’t grumble.     I do like busses really.

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